You are not alone!
I am very certainly no expert on this! Perhaps one will be along in a mo?
Meanwhile...
Many think that gap between stay/jib is too small.
If you watch the various swallow promotional videos on utube, you may notice that the demo BRe boat has no forestay.
Apparently many do this? Not me, generally.
Uncomfortable with this, besides which i have a "best" jib, that is semi battened and far too good to roller furl. When in use, It must be lowered to use the assym. In which case no jib halyard to act as surrogate forestay.
That said, we've not really tried to fly this best jib and the spinni at the same time.
You may also note, that even with no forestay, video of full, successful gybes is rare
?.
I gave up the struggle on inside gybes long ago. I rig to gybe outside the jib/forestay.
I rig my spinni in a large garden trug/bucket thing clipped up in the companionway. Generally try to always launch/retrieve over the port side (stbd tack safety/advantage) especially when singlehanded.
With the addition of a "jib-dick", or more politely a "gybulator" to my asymm sail, (google them!) So as reduce chances of lazy sheet going into the water, or worse, under the boat.....
.... and a short carbon fibre extension (temporarily attached - in case of close quarters situations) to my bowsprit, as an emergency "catcher" for the sail, it's perfectly feasible to use the assym singlehandedly, at least when cruising.
Just take care to try to flag the sail round the bow, or put the other way, rotate the boat under the sail streaming out in front of the boat.
My issue then becomes sheet loads, even with ratchet blocks. Thicker sheets needed? I use gloves.
However, tbh, I'm not yet competent/confident to do all of the above, singlehandedly in the pressure/heat of a race.
Hope this helps?
Also hope someone more experienced than me can add to this!