Hello Chris and Sandra.
I certainly would not recommend you try and hoist your outboard over the bows after launching. It is far easier to fit it whilst she is on the trailer and you can even perfectly well tow with it in place - in fact in my case it is useful to do so as it makes the nose weight lighter on my tow bar.
I have a mercury 6 which weighs in at about 27 kg and can just lift it onto the outside of the coaming (use some protective sheeting) then I get on board pick it up and lower it onto the transom bracket. My fuel tank lives in the starboard locker.
I can see your problems re boarding! Again I personally would not even attempt climbing over the bows! When she is in the water under control with long mooring lines and the vehicle and trailer are put away, bring the boat back in stern first using the mooring lines with engine lifted so not to damage the prop and she can be boarded up the swim ladder in very shallow water.
Or perhaps launch with one person on board to take control of the boat whilst the other parks vehicle and trailer, the boat then being brought back in stern first to the slip/beach area using long mooring lines and engine lifted to prevent damage to the prop and the second person boards up the swim ladder. Keep the rudder lifted as it is quite deep and you'll damage it if you go too shallow, especially backwards.
Reverse for recovery back to trailer using the kedge anchor to pull yourself back into the slip/beach.
Fishermans waders or a light weight sailing drysuit is really useful.
Just some suggestions that may help you?
If you have any other queries then put 'em up here - we have loads of BC23 experience between us all!
Andy
BC23 Equinox