Tips On Launching Your Beautiful Swallow Boat (Lighthearted)

From my experience see the words of wisdom below, this definitely is a library post for all to have a go at posting their pearls of wisdom on.

  • NEVER launch when there is any possibility of being spotted with a Swallow Boat!
  • Try to disguise your craft with shape changing panels available from any good new car manufacturer.
  • Try to keep your craft as grimy as possible – naturally occurring green moss is excellent.
  • Only rig your craft craft at the last moment to avoid being spotted with unusual nostalgic looking sails.
  • If unable to avoid eye contact with passing admirer do not enter into conversation as you will never get the boat launched – choose a language of your choice and make appropriate noises
  • Simulate Flu, or better still, Norovirus